I'm sick, i'm nauseous, it's so gross I don't wanna throw up, I've gotta make myself throw up, please throw up, I almost feel better, stop looking at me like that I just need to puke.
WHAT, WHAT, WHAT WAIT WHERE AM I, NO SHUT UP, WHAT IS MY ISSUE, NOTHING IS GOOD, WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY, WHAT THE FUCK, IT WONT STOP, IT DOESN'T STOP, IT WONT STOP, NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER
Omg wow omg omg omg wow he's right next to me wow, he's touching me, I want to touch him. Wow I wow I wow oh my god, he's so hot wow, how could he ever like someone like me, wow he's so perfect wow
Put it in the hatch, swallow, put it in the hatch, swallow, put it in the hatch, gets stuck in your throat, it doesn't even work, why bother just do it, I just have to wait, put it in the hatch, choke
I can't shake the feeling, it won't go, maybe its ok though. I can bare this feeling, I like this feeling, I feel like I tend to indulge in this feeling. I think of him, then I think of me. His body.
Immature, why is he so immature, just outburst after outburst after outburst. He's like a toddler, a feral animal, he needs to learn to control his natural instincts. They're bad, outburst, outburst.
UH OH UH OH UH OH UH OH!!!! I'M DONE, I'M GONNA FAIL, I'M DONE, I'M DONE. DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE. NOT GOOD ALL DONE, DONE? DONE FOR, WHY DONE? DONE... UH OH UH OH UH OH UH OH AAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAA NOO
Everything around me is irritating, I'm stressed and nothing is helping, it's loud, bright, crowded, so much. Loud, bright, crowded, too much. Over and over and over too much
This is not good not good not good, no good at all, if it looks like I don't care then therefore I don't care. Apparently. It might be good that way, it might be better. That's good, this is no good.
He doesn't know it yet but his hand is going to hurt, it's going to be bruised, swollen, and bloody, all scratched up. He's not gonna be able to do anything with his right hand and it's all his fault.
I broke the glass, my hand hurts, my hand really hurts, it's all a blur, it's swollen and ow, ow, ow my hand, my hand hurts, my hand hurts, my hand really hurts, fuck the glass, what about my hand.
We are ok, I'm ok it's ok I'm ok, I am all good, I am not cooked, I got this, I'm kicking my feet I'm all yes mega good I won't die, I don't die, I'm not able to die, I can't die, it wont let me
I need to get away from myself, I'm not good to me, this isn't funny anymore, I can't comfort myself and when I try I make it worse. I hate specific parts of myself. I'm a douche
I'm done for, I'm dead, I'm dead again, I'm not gonna do it, I can't do it, I can't take it, I think it's over with.
Ewwww ewww he's so gross oh awww ewwww, he still feels her hands, he scratches and bleeds and cries but it's ok if it's him, I love him, I love him, I really do, I think I'm a fag.
He's lacking, he's incompetent, he was made to be a lack of, he was made to help there be a lack of, some1 hurt some1 hurt some1 hurt, hurting, it's hurting, hurting, he does not feel, he is there
Why's he always mad, he's only here to be mad, he exists to be a personification of toxic masculinity, stupid man, he's such a douche bag. He's always lowering other people to make himself feel good
Shhh he's manic rn, and cheer, he's whimsy, and always happy he's always happy look him in the eyes he's always happy, no he's just manic, he's happy though look look!! make him do stupid stuff!! haha
My mental health is declining at a catastrophic and gradual rate and has been since December